BECOME YOUR DREAM

I yelled at my husband today. Well, at least my voice became louder and a bit more intense. I admit it. javascript:void(0)

This was not his fault. I do not blame him. He didn't even trigger me. Basically, I was yelling at MYSELF...through poor Ben.

Why was I feeling tension within?

My Soul is ready to soar as a business owner and entrepreneur. (YAY!) I am ready to shed my old skin of Super Woman Health and transform my business into a company that is truly congruent with my authentic Self and my Divine calling in life. This is playing it REALLY BIG! This is truly living my life's mission of serving the world through the teaching of self-love, owning our power, and living our dream lives.

Yet, my small self feels some fear about this. Mostly this comes up around the name of my company. I feel a deep call to the name: SEXY SOUL WELLNESS. It speaks to my truth, my heart, my mission on this earth. To help other women re-claim their inner Sexy, their Goddess within and celebrate that power! When I say, I am Cora Poage, Owner of Sexy Soul Wellness, my spirit starts to sing and dance.

However, I have received feedback that "sexy" might scare some people away, or attract the "wrong" type of clientele...LOL. I am nervous that my business might be a little "too much" for some people to handle. I am even worried about seeming risque or something.

Yet, I can't shake the feeling that this name is speaking to me for a reason. I feel that SEXY SOUL WELLNESS will attract just the right top of client for me. Im motivated to re-claim the word SEXY as empowered feminine characteristic! My daily affirmation is "I am enthusiastically loving and accepting ALL of me. I am living my truth Out Loud with Gusto." This is my dream business name, this is living Out Loud.

Yesterday, I was walking down 85th and I was feeling deep gratitude for all the amazing blessings that I have been receiving from the Universe lately. I glanced to my right, where someone had discarded a large, red easy chair. Written very largely in permanent marker, were the words, BECOME YOUR DREAM.

Today, I walked out of my favorite Health Food Store on 3rd Ave, and saw a rather disgusting discarded mattress on the street. In large black permanent marker, was the message: BECOME YOUR DREAM.

I hear you Universe! Thank you. I am ready.

To Do List:

1. Call Ben and apologize.

2. Read the Goddess Oracle Card that I drew today: PELE: DIVINE PASSION..."Be honest with yourself: What is you heart's true desire?" OMG.

3. Change my business name to Sexy Soul Wellness.

4. BECOME MY DREAM

Who are YOUR Bridge Partners?

"We are getting so great at Bridge!", my 84 year old client shared with me. "My husband and I are tickled pink because we truly beat everyone we play!" She laughed and then continued, "Do you know what my son said when I told him that we are winning every game?"

Her son is President of a major Institution, and a widely known, very successful inspirational speaker and teacher.

She continued, "He said to me, 'Mom, then you are playing with the wrong people.'"

I love this advice because at some point in our lives, as our skills grow, our wisdom increases, and we aren't learning anymore, we have to make the choice to find new Bridge partners or risk playing small for the rest of our lives. It reminds me of high-school basketball games. Our coach would often yell, "You guys are playing down to the other team's level. You are so much better than them." We often played our best games against the most skilled teams.

I just returned to Manhattan from an incredible girlfriend retreat with my beautiful friend Molly. Every time I spend time with Molly in person, or over the phone, I am challenged, inspired, and awakened. Her depth of Being, her spiritual journey, and her incredible wisdom are so life giving for me. When I am with Molly, I am Me. No filter, no playing small, no trying to hide my light, or my dark, for that matter. I am truly alive and in the Now.

When I am with Molly, I am definitely playing Bridge with the RIGHT person.

Ali Brown, A Business and Empowerment Coach, shared in one of her tele-seminars that we are the sum of the five people in our lives with whom we spend the most time.

Who are my Top 5?

The children I tutor
The Chef at the house of the children I tutor (I REALLY love her gazpacho, so I tend to "drop in" to the kitchen quite often!!)
Ben (husband)

Probably in that order...oh boy. These are my bridge partners. Am I truly playing with the right people in my life?

Ali began to take questions from the class. One woman (We'll call her Susan) shared that she had all these huge dreams and goals and she was so excited about them, but her friends seemed less than enthused when she shared these aloud. They told her that her dreams were "kinda big and crazy."

What did Ali say? You might have guessed already, but her response was as follows; "It's time to get new friends." She went on to share that Susan didn't have to STOP loving her old friends, but needed to find other people who supported her, who wanted to play it BIG in life also.

Ali recommended that it was time for Susan to start playing Bridge with the right people.

My senior year of high-school, I had a major shift in life perspective around the time of Hurricane Katrina. The day I heard about the catastrophe, I couldn't sleep at night. I kept picturing people trying to sleep without a roof, blankets, and pillows. In the morning, I called my friends Nichole and Preeti, and we decided to start a group called Project Esperanza (Hope in Spanish), a Community Service group that would raise money for the Red Cross. We used a Double Date Raffle(totally rigged in my favor by the way! My secret is out Aaron and Grant!), a MORP (Sadie Hawkin's Dance, and Singing Telegrams...HILARIOUS! We raised A LOT of money AND had a ton of fun. I felt like I was playing BIG, answering my Calling, and living in a flow deeply connected to Source.

What really surprised me at the time, was how many of my other "friends" weren't very supportive of this endeavor. "Oh, Cora just started this club for attention or for her college applications." (brilliant idea, but I'd already applied...lol) In truth, my "Party on the Weekend" friends and I began to drift apart. The people who I connected with around Project Esperanza, around hope and service, became my closest friends moving forward. Many of these folks are still my friends to this day.

Eckhart Tolle says that as we embark on the path to living in the Now, from our Authentic Self, connected to the Divine, it will become more and more clear when we are not surrounded by others who are vibrating at that frequency also. He states that it will be like "oil and water". He says that trying to change the other people is impossible. It is time to move on, to find new friends, new relationships, your very own Molly.:)

I have come to believe that in life, certain relationships with people, jobs, and other commitments are meant to transform, and sometimes even come to completion. I have learned not to see this as a "bad" thing, but as a natural falling away, like the changing of seasons.

One of my Vision Boards reads:

"Every time you let go of something limiting, you make room for something better."

This does not mean that the shift has to be dramatic, nasty, or ugly. Quite the opposite, actually. This can be a peaceful, natural, parting or closure.

There might be a short mourning or reflection time as we change Bridge partners, but soon this this will be replaced by a new chapter, an amazing opportunity, a beautiful manifestation of our true destiny.

Who will my top 5 be in three months?

Ben, God, my incredible family, my business partner, acting and singing coaches, my USM family, the Editor of my book, my agent, my celebrity clients?

I do know one thing, that my Top 5 will be different. Because I am growing, saying YES to the Divine's Plan for me, playing it BIG! I am finding new Bridge partners. I am feeling the changing of the seasons and I am embracing the shift with peace, joy, and gratitude.

For now, I will relish every spoonful of Gazpacho...

Deserving of our Dreams?

I recently read that Roberto Assagioli, a famous psychologist, defined neurosis as "vacillating in the decision seat".

Oh boy, can I relate to this. Just yesterday morning, I received an amazing email from the father of the family I tutor. I rolled over in bed as my alarm blared, tried to turn of my phone and noticed a blinking red light, informing me of a new email. As I read the words, my heart almost jumped out of my chest!

"Hey Cora

We have sort of a crazy idea. Not sure if it would interest you so it's an open invite. For spring break we are going to Geneva Chamonix and then Verona Cortina and Venice. If you would like to join us for some or all of the trip we and the kids would love to have you."

What a way to wake up! I was floored! My dreams were coming to fruition. I have an Ideal Scene/Vision Board hanging up in my bedroom titled TRAVELING. Underneath the main heading there is one line that reads: "I am lovingly saying yes to traveling for my job." Another line says: "I am joyfully accepting opportunities to travel for free!" Under my ideal scene for my Tutoring Job, it reads, "I am gratefully receiving amazing bonuses and gifts."

Here was the Universe saying YES, the co-creating was in Full Force! I was so pumped!

So what happened next? I was on a high most of the day. Then, in the evening, I felt a shift. I felt my brain start to THINK..."Wait a minute Cora, you have homework. Weren't you going to deep clean your apartment? What about your business? What if it isn't fun? You haven't skied since you were 13." I began to realize that my Over-Thinking was starting to lead me to Paralysis by Analysis or Assagioli's definition of neurosis.

I was starting to feel a bit crazy. And then Ben asked me the most important question ever.

"Cora, remember how you felt when you first heard about this option? You were so excited and ready to go! You saw it as the Universe manifesting your desires and dreams." Then he looked at me carefully, like he wasn't quite sure how to say this next part. "Cora, is there a part of you that doesn't feel like you DESERVE this gift?"

Whoah! He zoomed right in on one of the major reasons for my vacillation. There was a small, but loud, part of me that didn't feel deserving, as a tutor, employee, or person. And that part of me was gaining power from my over-thinking and indecision.

Limiting Belief: "I do not deserve to have all my wildest dreams come true."

This line in my script does not serve me anymore. This keeps me playing small!!

Self-Forgiveness: "I forgive myself for buying into the misunderstanding that I am undeserving of gifts, bonuses, or manifestation of my dreams."

Whew. Much better. Deep breath. I totally deserve to have all my dreams come to fruition. We all do! Why? Because God/The Universe/The Divine has put us on this Earth to live out our true exciting, exhillerating, incredible life's purpose. This does not mean playing small. As John Rogers states, "It's foolish not to win in your own fantasies." Or Marianne Williamson, "We were born to make manifest the Glory of God that is within us." or "What you are truly seeking, is also seeking you."-Clarissa Pinkola Estes

This or something better for the highest good of all concerned!

When I put my intentions into the care of the Universe, the Universe responds tenfold. Why? Because I am fulfilling my destiny. I am serving my calling as a Divine conduit of light, love, and miracles. I choose to say YES to the magic, to trust the Divine Process, to leap into the unknown. Then, my only job is to express deep gratitude, excitement, and enthusiasm for the magical manifesting that is truly occurring in my life, in all our lives, when we open our eyes, our ears, and most importantly, our hearts.

Soul Gazing

Soul Gazing

Part of my Spiritual Psychology Grad School Weekend at the University of Santa Monica includes a practice called Soul Gazing. This is always one of the last activities of the weekend.

Description: Find a partner. Gaze into his/her eyes, into their soul, with love and acceptance or whatever else comes up for TWENTY-FIVE seconds. Oh, did I mention that the partners are holding hands? There is always a beautiful, loving song playing in the background as well. After 25 seconds, a bell rings, and we move on to the next person. This continues until the song ends.

The first time we practiced this activity, I literally almost ran out the door. No joke. This was too much for me. The intimacy was so deep and intense. I found myself wanting to look away from anyone who was looking at me. I was jealous even, of the folks who seemed so totally able to maintain strong, loving eye contact. I just knew I wasn't doing this right. I found myself trapped in self-consciousness and self-doubt.

I zig zagged around the room, trying to hide, although there was nowhere to go. I was going to be "seen" to be "loved" no matter what. It was rather frightening.

As person by person took my hands and gazed into my eyes with love and acceptance, I suddenly felt a shift inside my body, my soul that brings me to tears even in the present moment.

Maybe it was the second or third person, a good friend of mine actually. I took his hands, feeling more comfortable. He warmly made eye contact, his face shining with light. I took a deep breath and suddenly I dropped out of my head and into my heart. And I SAW my beautiful friend's soul. His love and Divine light poured from his eyes into mine. My brain stopped the Inner Critic chatter and I was in the present, in the Loving.

As I truly SAW his soul, I felt myself being SEEN. I received his love and acceptance with deep gratitude. The exchange was incredible. I actually didn't want to STOP Soul Gazing.

From that moment on, each and every experience of Soul Gazing has been more and more beautiful. Sometimes the soul, the light, or even the dark that is present for another person or for myself brings me to tears. Sometimes I feel like I am being embraced deeply by the person across from me. Other times, I feel like I am literally falling in love with my partner.

I have begun to bring Soul Gazing into my every day life. There are moments when I Soul Gaze with myself in the mirror. What a powerful exchange of unconditional self-love. Other times, it is with my husband, especially when I note that I am not feeling present or in the Loving. It is so fun with the kids I tutor. As they tell me stories about their day including difficult tests or silly pranks they may have pulled, I look deep into their beautiful eyes with love and acceptance and I am so present and grateful and in love with their Beings.

I even do this on the streets of New York City. Although, usually not for 25 seconds. That can illicit some awkward interactions.:) Yet, when I pass someone on the street I look into their eyes, and see the Loving Essence, the soul that is within and I feel the energy of love like an ocean wave washing over us both.

I truly believe that I could fall in love with each and every person's Being if given 25 seconds of Soul Gazing. I recommend it to couples when challenged by disagreement, or to family members who are bickering. Take the time to soul gaze, to truly See and Be Seen, and trust me, you will fall in love with the divine within us all and there will be a tremendous energetic shift.

I even advise this practice for International Peace Mediation. If the leaders of warring factions Soul Gazed with the children from the country they are fighting or the soldiers from two sides of a conflict Soul gazed across the border at one another, there could be no more war. Because when we look into another beings Soul, we see our brothers, sisters, friends, parents, and most of all we see OURSELVES. Because at a soul level, I am you, and you are me. How can we hurt other souls having human experiences? How can we truly See and Be Seen, and still destroy each other?

Try it. Let me know how it goes. Start with yourself in the mirror. Take 25 seconds to stare deep into your eyes, into the Loving, and see the truth. You will start by giving and receiving love, and soon there will be nothing left but LOVE. Love, our birthright, our destiny, our true essence.

Pigeon Poo

A couple days ago, I was walking in the New York City winter sunshine, when I paused to wait for the cross walk to signal that I could continue. Suddenly, I heard a HUGE SPLAT and glancing just to my right, I realized that I had been inches away from being baptized by a pigeon's digested breakfast.

"Whew," I said to myself. "That was a close call. I was almost nailed!"

My mind slipped back to one of my first memories from college when a friend and I were walking down the street chatting. Out of nowhere, a sea gull flying above us released it's wastes on the long, curly hair of my unsuspecting companion. She handled it very well, after, "Oh my god, it's so gross. Get it out. GET IT OUT!"

I realized in that moment, that it doesn't matter how great you are, sometimes shi*t happens. My friend is an awesome, amazing, incredible person, and she STILL got shat on. She handled it gracefully and laughed about it later however, which I greatly admired.

Staring at the white blob on my right, I pondered if I would handle that situation so well. I'm sure it would be a learning experience, where I would be called to let go, laugh at myself, and move on with grace and ease. Sometimes it's the dirtiest, stinkiest, most icky experiences that teach me the most in life. Blessings in disguise. Life lessons. A chance to pick a constructive or destructive response to the metaphorical poo that sometimes falls from the sky when we least expect it.

I looked up in the sky and suddenly realized I was standing directly under a lamp post with LITERALLY 20 pigeons chilling right above my head. It was seriously a pigeon hotel or something. I might as well have painted a bulls eye on my face.

It took me a split second to make the decision to step to the left and move far, far away. Blessings in disguise and all that are great, but there are other ways to learn life's lessons that don't include pigeon poop.

Then I realized that a deep Learning had occurred, one in which I will carry with me forever. The Universe offers us Free Will and choice, which can be a beautiful thing when used wisely...My new found wisdom is as follows:

"Sh*t happens, but I sure as heck don't have to be target practice."